Author: kurdoodle
Title: 5/5
-
Simple,
and to the point.
-
Short
titles help to catch the reader’s attention.
Poster/Background/Design:
5/5
-
Simple
and plain background, with a beautiful poster that suited the genre really
well.
Description/Foreword: 10/10
-
Clear,
neat and detailed without revealing too much of the story(: Good work!
Characters: 15/15
-
Your
characterization was good. Their personalities were shown and not merely told
to the readers.
-
The
characters’ emotions and their reaction towards events were portrayed.
-
You
were able to show how the characters felt towards the people around them.
Plot: 22/30
- The title suited the plot perfectly.
- The contrast between
selflessness and selfishness was shown.
- It was not overly melodramatic,
and the storyline was very interesting.
- The plot was realistic. It
wasn’t like the usual popular-stars-noticing-that-ordinary-girl-among-their-thousands-of-fans
storyline. It also showed how, under the influence of alcohol, the uncle would
become a changed person and abuse the sisters.
- On a whole, the plot was
really good. However, there was missing information in the plot. You didn’t
mention why the Kim family wanted to take Jessica, Krystal and their mother in.
And if they could take them in and give their mother a salary, why would they say
that they don’t have the means to provide for Jessica and Krystal later on?
Flow/Pace: 5/5
- Your flow was smooth
throughout the story – be it the flashback or the transition from one scene to
another.
- Your pace was just right(:
Writing Style: 8/10
- You have a unique writing
style. Your descriptions were good.
- You were able to keep the
reader’s attention all the way.
- However, more description on
how Jessica felt when her uncle hit her would help bring out the reader’s
emotions.
Originality/Creativity: 5/5
- It was original, and it was
very creative(:
Punctuation/Spelling/Tenses/Grammar/Vocabulary:
14/15
- You had no problems in your
punctuation and spelling.
- Tenses were correct.
- There were some
typographical errors here and there.
- You have a good foundation
in vocabulary.
Marks Achieved: 89/100
Grade: A
~~~~~~~
Corrections
You had no errors except for a few minor
typographical errors. Keep up the good work! ^^
Side Note:
You write really well! I enjoyed your story very much(: Looking
forward to reading more of your stories~
♥ cheonsa
~~~~~~~
No comments :
Post a Comment