aingeal1004 ©
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
Requester:
Melinda
Genre:
Angst, Romance
Characters
Lee Taemin (SHINee)
Age:
18 years old
Minyoung (fictional)
Age:
16 years old
~~~~~~~
Chapter One: Broken
“Let’s
break up.” Minyoung stared into my eyes, her voice emotionless. “We have no
more reason to be together.”
I
didn’t know how to react. I would have begged, pleaded for her to stay,
kneeled, anything… Anything at all – just for her to stay, to take back those
words. But nothing came out from my mouth. It hurt so much I couldn’t speak.
“I’m
sorry, oppa.” Her trembling voice and quivering lips betrayed her. “We have our
own lives now. We don’t have time for each other.”
I
could tell she was hurting too, but I was too useless. I didn’t know how to
ease her pain. I couldn’t give her what she needed. I could barely even pay for
my own expenditures.
“Ah.”
It was all I managed to force out. “I know.”
“Oppa,
this teddy bear… Keep it. When you are troubled, just talk to it.” She held out
a big, cuddly bear whose face was bigger than mine. “It will help you. Promise
me you’ll take care of it, okay?”
I
was surprised and sad and hesitant all at once. Emotions churned through me. I
wanted to just grab her hand and run off with her somewhere, but I couldn’t. I
was surprised, too, as Minyoung was never one for cute and fluffy things. She
was quiet and gentle by nature, and was mostly rather serious. I was at loss of
what to do, so I just took the bear and left. The very least I could do was not
to let her see me cry.
~~~
I
strode out of the room and slammed the door, shoulders stiff. Why couldn’t the
manager be more understanding? I am supposed to be home by my grandmother’s
side. She doesn’t have much time left…
This
is the second departure this year. Why couldn’t people stay by my side? Why do
they have to leave? It’s so hard, so painful. I leaned against the standing
cupboard. Glancing at the teddy bear, I decided to do something childish to
relieve my pain and stress.
“Yah!
Why can’t people stay with me forever?!” I punched the teddy bear on the
stomach. “Why, why, why?!”
“Oppa,
mianhae.” The teddy squeaked out as I stared at it with my eyes wide open.
“Oppa, mianhae.”
“Saranghae,
oppa.” It continued. “Smile please!”
“Pabo,”
I scolded myself inwardly. “It’s just a recording.”
For
an instance, I thought I sensed Minyoung. No, I actually thought the bear was Minyoung. It made my knees weak. She still
wrote letters to me weekly, but I never managed to reply as there was no return
address.
“Because
she doesn’t want me to look for her…” I chuckled softly, tired and bitter.
Glancing
at the bear, guilt swamped me.
“I
shouldn’t have taken it out on you. Mianh-” I choked. I swear I saw that bear
nodding its head, telling me it forgives me. Shrugging and shaking my head, I
quickly stood up and walked out of the room. I must be too tired.
~~~
Taeminnie Oppa:
It is going to be winter soon. How are
you? I wish I could spend Christmas with you every year like we promised, but
I’m afraid I have to spend my Christmas at my school dorm without you again
like I did last year. At least I know you’ll spend it with Minho. Help me say
thanks to him for taking care of you whenever I’m not around, all right? I pray
that Taeminnie Oppa’s Christmas would be filled with joy, love and much
laughter~!
Smile always because you deserve it(:
Minyoung
“Letter
number 1-8-7.” I mumbled to myself as I labelled the letter and put it into the
colourful box already filled with letters from Minyoung. I had kept all her
letters – the first confession letter, the letter she wrote to me when we were
dating, and many more. They were always short and simple. But, as she always
told me, short and sweet makes the perfect pair.
This
year, though, I’m not going to be contented with just a letter anymore. I’m
going to find her by Christmas. I’m not letting her spend Christmas without me
anymore. I love her… I still do, and will continue to.
~~~~~~~
Chapter Two: Cherished
Memories
“Only
one day to Christmas…” I whispered.
With
the fluffy bear in hand, I stood at the train station. I was heading to Minho’s
house. Perhaps some part of me always knew, but it still caused my throat to
constrict as tears threatened to fall thinking of it. He didn’t tell me. A part
of me screams ‘betrayal’, but another part of me knew he did it for me.
~~~
I
knocked on the door hesitatingly. I didn’t know how to confront Minho about it.
“Taeminnie!
You’re here early. I thought you were coming on Christmas to celebrate with us?”
Minho’s mother smiled warmly at me. “Come in, it’s cold out there.”
“Thank
you, Mrs Choi. I… I’m actually here to look for Minho.” I looked into her eyes
and saw understanding. She knew me as well as my own mother.
She
hugged me tightly. “Go on inside. He’s in his room.” She said as she gestured
towards Minho’s room.
~~~
“Hyung…”
“Tae?
What happened? Is anything wrong?” He turned around; his back facing his
computer. He looked concerned as he registered my pale looks.
“I
found out. Why didn’t you tell me?” My voice sounded cold and emotionless. “Where
is she now?”
“Oh.”
I saw knowledge flicker in his eyes. “I-I’m sorry, Taemin-ah.”
“Why
– didn’t – you – tell – me?” I articulated each word, anger seeping into me.
“She
didn’t want you to know.” He fumbled. “S-She… She loved you too much,
Minnie-ah.”
“So
where is she now?! I… I really want to see her…” Tears began cascading down my
cheeks. “Why didn’t she tell me she was sick? Why?”
“Taemin-ah,
be strong. Promise hyung you won’t break down no matter what.” He looked at me
seriously. “She’s… She’s gone.”
“G-Gone?
Gone where?” I collapsed into a heap in Minho’s lap, sobbing uncontrollably. “H-how…
H-How d-do I make h-her c-come back?”
“I…
Tae, I’m so sorry.”
I
held the bear tightly in my arms as Minho let me pour out my grief.
“Oppa,
saranghabnida.” The bear squeaked out. “Bogosipeoyo.”
I
froze. It was not right. Recordings repeat. I sat rooted to the spot as
realization filled me.
~~~
Taemin-ah:
If you’re reading this letter, it
means you’ve found out. I can’t stay much longer. My time would begin to run
out from the moment you find out. I’ll miss you, but I’m glad I managed to
spend my last few moments with you. Don’t ever doubt that I love you. And
please… Keep smiling and living for me. I’ll always be with you – in your
memories, your thoughts and your heart. I was given a last chance to be with
you, and I’m grateful for it. I’m contented to have met you, and even more – to
have been with you. Don’t give up in everything you do. Most importantly, don’t
give up loving.
With love,
Minyoung
This
last letter was written in Minyoung’s scrawled handwriting. It pained my heart
to know that it was the medicine taking effect on her. Written on a hospital
notepad, this letter may be the ugliest, but it is the one I’ll treasure the
most.
Facing
the bear, I whispered ‘I love you’ and bid Minyoung a silent goodbye. I hugged
it tightly.
“Oppa,
smile.” The bear squeaked faintly. “Please?”
I
forced a smile and hugged the cuddly bear tighter. I felt it when she left. It
was suffocating, but I held back my tears. When I knew she left, I didn’t stop
smiling. Because I knew she’ll be watching me, and I hoped that she would
remember that my smile was the last thing she saw before she left.
Don’t worry Minyoung, I’ll
live well. Only for you… Always. Merry Christmas, sweetheart.
